lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
i don't plan on having that self control this summer
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
So I have some interesting news. The pizza guy called the cops on me...
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
She barfed in the corner of the baby pool. Then she yelled "it's okay" repeatedly while trying to scoop it out.
I just sent her mug shot out in a mass text because I hate her and her cocaine eyes are hilarious.
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
MY MOM WALKED IN WHILE I WAS EATING THEM OUT AND STARTED ASKING US ABOUT THE PROJECT RUNWAY EPISODE WE WERE WATCHING EARLIER
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
But seriously like how many girls do you know that will do that on the first date?
One?
ONE! And it was was glorious!
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