Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
Need to stop getting stoned with this chick, I keep waking up covered in pizza sauce
Some guy just delivered flowers to my roommate cause he fell off a roof onto her at a party last night. I think they have a date tomorrow.
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
My general physician told me i have the emotional capacity of a 2 year old, While he refilled my xanax prescription. That's service!
Your grandma changed her Netflix password :(
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
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