Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
Remember that time i walked in on your friend taking a huge shit?
Remember that time you hooked up with him?
We were hooking up, both of us naked. She starts putting her clothes back on and says, "I have to go to the bathroom." I reply, "No you don't, you're leaving." Without hesitation she looks at me and says, "Yeah."
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
If this were a real emergency kilted men wielding claymores and riding giant badgers would hve rescued said Guinness. So clearly this is just a hypothetical
You gave me a bottle of tequila and introduced me to a ginger named cowboy. I actually love you.
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
I wasn't even hungover I was just mourning my dignity
i'm sitting in my room 'bout to smoke a bowl. also, i found out that you don't need a permit to own a tiger in wisconsin, so we're buying one when we move in together.
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
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