just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
She wouldn't go home with me cause I forgot her name. I didn't realize it would matter after she danced with her vagina on my face
the girl next to me in class is drinking a margarita out of a slurpee cup. i know your going to ask how i know its a margarita and the answer is i can smell the tequila. i never want to leave this place
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
Just got kicked out of two hot tubs. We were naked the second time. So awkward getting out in front of the security guard.
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
so, i guess i gotta chill on showing up to work hungover... someone anonymously left a bible in my work mailbox (no one else got one)
He took me home and by the time I woke up after catching up on sleep I realized I accidentally put on one of his fiances socks. whoops.
You were filing your nipples with a nail file to "make them sharper"
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