its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
He brought me bullshit flowers and a bullshit apology. Even shrek did more than that for Fiona. And he's an ogre. Does this not say anything about him?
LOVE ME LIKE A KANGARO LOVES A POUCH YOU DUMB CUNT
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
Roommate is eating a chimichanga, watching Dr Doolittle 2 and weeping. His Tuesday hangovers make me feel better about my life.
I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.
Got cut off last night cuz this chick had her hands down my shorts and was blatantly playing with my dick while I was trying to order. apparently that's "frowned upon"
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
Fireball goes down like mother's milk. Btw your housemate is naked
We finally gave up searching because everything had started to look like flip flops
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
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