She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
I'm sorry. I know you didn't expect me to be arm deep in vagina when you walked through the door.
The only thing I remember is doing a toddlers and tiaras dance routine onstage. I fucking CURTSIED.
OMG stop. Pretty feet? Sparkle baby!
I had to wash my hair with conditioner because my sister got hammered and gave the dog a 3am sprinkler bath with my shampoo.
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
Zak is like the Picasso of masterbatory texts
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
just bought myself a "your about to get violated in every way so you deserve this chipotle" steak bowl.
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
Are you feeling better yet?
I need a nap and a new butthole
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
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