I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
I just saw the Donald Trump of homeless quys walking down the street. He had three shopping carts and a bike.
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
You may have cured my horniness. I feel like my libido just got shat on by kittens who live on an enchanted rainbow.
I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
Some girl just walked passed me, said "fuck yeah!" and is now crawling up the stairs
Yeah. Moral of the story: Don't mace yourself. It sucks dick.
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
We were both too drunk to drive home. So we did it in the coat closet and then I walked home. 20/20 hindsight: Could have both walked to my apartment and then had sex there.
you are the root of all my greats nights and my worsts decisions
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
Randomize