i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
i got so high last night i cried hysterically for like 5 minutes because i dont have any superpowers
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
Either I'm drunk or judge Judy has 3D commercials...so I think I'm drunk. Also I may or may not haven eaten a hoagie on the toilet when I didn't want to stand up
I'm really sorry that I blew your friend in your bed, but to be fair he started it.
I got to her place and she was petting her cat and pounding vodka out of the bottle. She looked like Dr evil in yoga pants. She's nuttier than squirrell shit.
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
Randomize