i overslept, had to take a cab to the train station, might puke, bought the wrong flavored vitamin water, and mj's dead. what a terrible world to wake up to.
I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
I wish you got a notification every time someone masturbated to a Facebook picture of you...
We're listening to the crystal method and doing bong hits for jesus
How are you texting me from 1998?
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
He waited exactly 18 minutes to booty call me after his break up.
I realised my life had gone downhill since being unemployed when I was making key lime pie on acid at 3am Tuesday morning.
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
My throw up tasted like pumpkin, fall is right around the corner.
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
At the ER. John needs stiches. Fuck pub trivia nights.
Randomize
