It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
You always know it is going to end badly when a guy asks if he met you at a "coed naked lawn bowling party"
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
Yep I can make a seagull sound. It's identical. I tried it. They thought I was talking to them. It's pretty cool.
Pretty sure I used toilet water to wash vomit off my face last night...
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
I texted him in the morning wishing him a day as spectacular as his dick was.
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
THANKS BE TO BLACK BABY JESUS IN HIS LITTLE GOLDEN DIAPER FOR BLESSING ME WITH NOT PREGNANT
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