Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
We need to start having sex underwater more often.
some random kid just walked into our apartment with two cases... I don't know who he is but I like him
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
He literally just patted me on the vagina and said goodnight to it.
She took me to ER. She says thought it was a squirtgun filled with vodka and she was 'marking me for later.' Thank god it's a flesh wound, and we're cool and going to date.
gtg, the cops are here
its official, you're fucking me on my lunch break. the only thing I want in my mouth is your dick. pick me up at noon.
want fries with that?
Randomize
