Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
She looked kinda like Mario Batali?
dude, i have to cancel tonight, my neighbor just bought a goat
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
Hungover like ... in bed with the Brita pitcher and a straw, only opening one eye at a time.
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
Also when they left they could only find one sock between the two of them. Apparently we're like crazy sock ripping vixens when we bring guys home drunk
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
Glad I can drunkenly remember to not get tomatoes on my Mexican pizza but can't tell a guy to keep his hands off my ass
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
I've seriously never been more thankful for marijuana and my resting bitchface.
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
Dude, I just masturbated with my cat sleeping on my boobs....
You have GOT to get this crazy cat lady thing under control. I'm finding you a man. And you'll take him, and thank me. After that text, you have no right to be picky.
Can I borrow a thong? I’m having drinks with a cute boy tonight and I’m out of clean underwear
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