i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
We have a vodka soaked ShamWow with your name on it.
worst hand job ever. my dick is about as raw as that sushi your mom wanted me to try.
Did you dl zombie porn on my computer?
what do 4 police cars, 1 ambulence, and 2 fire truycks have in common?.... My driveway
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
Why are there jello shots in the kitchen drawer?
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
Perfect. I'll put on my party clothes and write emergency numbers on my arm
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
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