I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
So my mouth tastes like dick. Does that explain how our talk went?
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
Just got offered a dog by two Meth head's one of which wasn't wearing shoes and continually saying "fuck"
Tried to put an eye patch on while hooking up with a girl. She was not amused.
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
I couldn't figure out what was more important, finishing the shot or putting out the fire on my leg.
hurry there's a jack Daniels slip n slide and clothes are coming off faster than I can even comprehend oh thank god for autocorrect
Dad literally changed the channel from an episode of Big Bang Theory to another episode of Big Bang Theory. That's why I hate this show.
I text the word "masturbation" so much, all it only takes my iPhone to auto-spell it is for me to type "mas".
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