Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
Slut skills are useful in every country.
She told me she was selfish for not giving me a blowjob... I couldn't agree more.
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
I've decided I'm either going to ease him into this breakup by having a threesome with him and the girl I'm leaving him for, or be brutal and fuck his room mate. it depends how nice he is tonight.
Im drunk on a hayride surrounded by toddlers. they are judging me.
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
I praised you last night for winning a chug off...you thanked me with a ridiculously hard headbutt. Thanks dick.
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
I told him he was like my favorite pair of jeans; I may not wear them every day, but I'll never get rid of them and they make my ass look fantastic. Needless to say he was not thrilled.
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
I may or may not be drinking in a church parking lot.
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
Randomize