So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
Its the little things i like about bein home like having actual toilet paper instead of subway napkins
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
I feel like as your wife, as cool with your decision-making skills as I usually am, there should be a bigger explanation to you adopting a child while I'm in Houston.
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
Ahh, 151. Think of it this way: it took one shot to get you buzzed, I took eight. I may or may not have broken a tv with my skull that night and met someone's parents naked and hungover the next morning.
Tried to put an eye patch on while hooking up with a girl. She was not amused.
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
Sometimes being bisexual is a curse. Turns out I banged both of her older twin brothers last summer.
I’m pretty sure I have teeth marks on my neck
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
Fursuit judi Dench just stared directly at me for 3 solid minutes telling me that cats arent dogs and i believe her because if i dont cat jason derulo might try to have sex with me
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