I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
Me liking this guy is the best diet ever. Do I want this cookie...or do I want to get laid.
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
I just followed a trail of feathers and glitter to class. Today better be fucking magical.
you pissed in the sink and didnt realize it until it was time to wash your hands
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
there's no food at this bar, but i'm pretty sure vodka is made of wheat so i'm basically drinking bread.
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again.
The girl next to me looks like the young version of sara (bonnie hunt) in jumanji. I wanna be like PLAY THE GAME SARA!!!!"
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
2020 sucks, I want a refund
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