We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
I bought 2 40s with winning lottery tickets and they paid me $.03. 'Merica
drinking from the bathtub cause I'm too lazy to walk downstairs and too thirsty to care
A man and his most likely hooker just bought us Taco Bell.
Woke up in a pile of people on the floor. His dad was already up and ask me to help him cook bacon because "7 lbs can be a mother fucker"
I either need to get adopted or have someone's baby, but I'm joining that family
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
Just text him and be like do you want this pussy or not. You have three seconds to respond.
She has also never texted me first which I think might be a tell-tale sign she wants me to die alone.
Before he gave me the breathelizer, he told me to "blow like you're blowing your boyfriend". I like him. My tax dollars are well spent
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
I described my life as a 7 layer cake of death
Do you ever wake up and realize playing beer pong with your parents wasnt a dream? Your mom really beat you
Randomize