Would you feel weird if I asked out ___?
You dont call on our son's bday but you want to know if I'll give you permission to date my best friend?
So...no?`
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
We have a drunk bartender with her nips a quarter inch from bein out buying us shots. GET HERE.
You just said the magic words
they just named my boobs. Lefty is "Guenevere" and Righty is "I claim this boob for America"
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
I AM SENDING THIS TEXT MESSAGE SO I DON'T LOOK AT HIM. THANK YOU FOR RECEIVING IT.
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
Just made a drunk dude do 20 push-ups. In the parking lot of the bar tonight for a keystone light I found in the back of my truck.
Oh yum
The only math I use in every day life is figuring out how much I can spend on alcohol and still have money to pay my bills. High school lied to us.
Randomize
