D3 body, D1 cock
He is such a slut. More and more my type.
we couldnt find her phone in the morning so i called it and found it under the bed. my name came up as 'regret'
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
Nothing like all your friends getting engaged to remind you how much fun sleeping around is.
We invented "Diesel Bombs." They're supposed to be a bomb, but they come in a 20+ oz. glass and have a blackout record of 6 wins and 0 losses. Undoubtedly going to be the next Muhammed Ali of the drinking world.
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
I'm stoned at 1030am, watching Maury with my exboyfriend. I need to make better choices with my life.
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
If your night didn't end with writing a witness report for the cops at a shwarma place, your night was probably less interesting than mine.
He wants me to tell you "my boner misses you"
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
Randomize
