She's JV to your varsity
it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
im just gonna turn drinking alone on new years into a tradition
My boyfriend just sent me flowers. I am now crying at the fact i fucked my fat neighbor. God please help me.
dude you need a shock collar for some of the things you say when you're drunk.
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
My brain is like scrambled eggs. If scrambled eggs were trying to escape out of my skull through my forehead.
I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
This is the second time you've stolen a pet when you're drunk, given it back and cashed in on a reward...I think you have a problem
Gotta pay my student loans some way
We broke up. My life is now 7 inches less.
When we were finished she immediately got up, cut a star out of a piece of paper, colored it gold, taped it to my chest and deemed me the Sheriff of Sex.
Randomize
