No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
We just built a bong out of a pineapple. I am never leaving hawaii. Ever.
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
Uhh, there's a legit bruise on my boob.. Again how does he manage this
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
I threw up in the shower, slipped, and fell in it. Should I try and continue my day or just get back in bed?
I traded the garbage men the rest of my handle for a ride home. Best. Walk. Of. Shame. Ever.
Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead
Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp.
Being in the club with your moms drunk friends > having a healthy relationship with your mom
Why do I have a separate credit card just for booze? Because I saved enough points so Saturday we are flying to Denver to smoke legal weed and fly back in the same day.
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
It was a bad idea to take ecstasy with cats in the house. No animal likes being touched that much. Let me know how your eye feels tomorrow
Randomize
