M and I are hungry and we are making your pizza in the fridge. But you're having sex and we're not so we dont feel bad.
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
My bathing suit kept falling whenever I went under a wave and this kid caught on and kept checking them out so I told him nothing comes free $5 a boob
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
He made the Waffle House lady get me out of the car. This isn't a joke.
I spilled wine on my pillowcase and I figure it's basically my lifeblood so I'm just leaving it
I just formed the "shit on a tree in Chicago club." And I feel awful about it.
Randomize
