Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
She said her name was "party"
do you think i can make that microwavable cake stuff with vodka instead of water?
you should probably use water
i dont have any
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
I just woke up with a bunch of French fries in my hand and a chocolate shake balancing on my pillow. Lovely.
so i say "rick dont build that sandcastle" and he "says ok i wont" then i wake up and its sandcastle fucking city all over my apartment
Then I realized I was alone sitting on the bathroom floor brushing my teeth at 2am laughing to myself.
I STRONGLY considered not bringing that guy home with me last night simply because I'd JUST changed my sheets that morning.
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
No he's here. We were watching Harry Potter stoned as shit and he fell asleep with his head in my lap. I'll figure out what to do with him after Harry gives Dobby the sock.
He tried to kiss me in the middle of hooking up... it was a deal breaker. I got off him and left.
So making out with chicks at the bar is fine and dandy, but your booty call can't kiss you? You have the strangest fucking rules...
your fucking longboard fell on me while we were having sex you fucking hipster
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
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