just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
We found a stripper pole in your closet. It seemed like a good idea. Alex will fix the hole in your wall. Sorry.
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
yeah but think of how much more hungover we'd be if we didn't steal those cookies
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
Well after we were arrested you just kept chanting "Like a good neighbor state farm is there"
The hair on my legs is officially flapping in the breeze when I walk. I must say, being single does have perks and this is one of them.
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
Company meeting and there he was. Felt a little weird like 'last night you were telling me how your dick loves me, and now we're listening to a report on sales figures'.
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
I refuse to fake an orgasm. If I'm dating him, he better work for that shit.
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
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