Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
i just picked a peanut m&m up off the floor. with my toes. and then proceeded to eat it.
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
so I'm coping with getting the "I'm not over my ex" bomb dropped on me by getting drunk and yelling at people while wearing a purple princess hat
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
How bad would it be to ask my maintenance man for new blinds because the dude puked on those too?
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
They want a bedroom just for their cats. And you thought we were gay.
Dude... this pee is not alleged
YOU SAT ON MY LAP!
Wuddup pee lap
Randomize