well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
Just paid for that girls abortion on my dad's black card. I feel like P-Diddy.
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
i just wanna lock my vagina in a safe filled with bandaids and healthy things
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
I swear god is testing me by giving me awesome guys with tiny penises
I almost died today via plastic wrap. I AM THE REASON THEY PUT WARNING LABELS ON THINGS.
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
So I think my motto should be "losing bras and dignity every weekend" but like in a really amazing way
I found more straws in my beard this morning. Please stop doing that.
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
HE LIVES IN ANOTHER STATE
actually scratch that last text, he's the perfect boyfriend. He stays faithful and doesnt find out about all the guys here. it's a win-win
I cam home to find him twitching on the floor, surrounded by unopened condoms and covered in cranberry sauce (yes I tasted it) while Thundercats was playing.
Randomize
