we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
Hungover like ... in bed with the Brita pitcher and a straw, only opening one eye at a time.
I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
I thought you were single?
I am. But thats cuz no one wants to marry shame and regret doused in tequila. But thanks for reminding me ya dick.
Is there a reason there's a dick print on my seventh-story window?
i think you lost all your innocence when you were caught straddling a fence in your thong & cowboy boots by the 40 year old apartment manager
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
I fell asleep in the tanning bed, naked, for an hour and a half and I guess they couldn't wake me up so they called the fire department...and they came in while I was passed out naked...
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
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