Take a Tylenol with a HUGE glass of water before you pass out, you'll thank me in the morning.
i dony have tylonal but i had a snickers and popcorn and a bottle of water and i am.. brushing my teeth!
btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
he believed the zit on my nose was a piercing...until he tried to bite it. needless to say he didnt ask for my number
The best part was her genuine shock and total "I didn't know" look when we said she couldn't cook a steak in a microwave.
just told my mom that i'm having a bad day and she responded with "maybe you should pour yourself a nice drink". good to know that my parents support my future of alcoholism
He was about to puke, and so I handed him an empty beer can. In retrospect, not very helpful.
If I ever mention marriage force me to Brazil to do coke and strippers until I die.
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
It is. We should just be drunk all the time forever everything is like just 90% more perfect
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
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