so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
well this feels familiar. awake at the crack of dawn laying in the fetal position praying for the sweet release of death. i think im done with jager for a while
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
When the cops knocked on the door, he just knocked back and announced "house keeping"
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
Beautiful wedding. Beautiful bride. I got shitfaced. Came home and ate two corndogs. I'm still single.
THERE IS A WINE CUBE IN MY ASS THIS IS NOT GOING AS PLANNED
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
your keys are upstairs on the nightstand or I put them in the hole in the wall
Just sitting at dinner with my dad...simultaneously texting "daddy" to confirm saturday's spanking and telling another guy to get condoms before Im done with dinner. Don't know when I got so ate up but I'm loving it. You?
Regretting asking you what you were doing.
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
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