The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
I think the recipie for awesome sauce is butter and semen
A cab driver remembered me by name, address, and ex fuck buddys nick name from a year ago. I mustve been one memorable shit show.
sorry for covering your dog in whipped cream. his bark made it sound like he wanted it.
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
We watched the first ever season of SNL and fucked for so long. He accidentally punched me in the face, but I mean, John Belushi was the background noise of our sex. I can deal with it.
I went out to have a smoke, and next thing I know, he's got me bent over a picnic table praying to deities I don't believe in. You should have been there.
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
hopefully I won't be diving through a thorn bush to escape an explosion this time
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
Randomize
