did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
the next pure michigan commercial i see, i am going to pee in a fucking lake
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
ok... i just had to be reminded that people in animal costumes were feeding me shots at the bar.
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
We were destined to go to rehab together
Decided I'm going to wear a shirt that says "I'm sorry" whenever we go back to that fraternity
I don't want to just break his heart, I want to dip it in liquid nitrogen and then smash it until it's powder and snort the powder
Why the fuck was I face down on the floor with you mounting me like a horse anyway? I'm so confused
I haven't been single on my birthday for 7 years. If you don't get me laid tonight, your best friend/wing woman status will be revoked.
Just reached for my phone in my non existant pocket while it was in my hand.
bonging vodka is the same level of "good idea" as eating machetes
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