Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
I think the waitress doesn't beleive I have friends coming. I've had 4 drinks and a large salad just waiting for you guys.
This ER has an aquarium in it!!!
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
Pretty sure I sang "What Makes You Beautiful" to some random guy in a parking lot last night...
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
I feel like we should build an island for girls that have committed atrocious numbers of unforgivable sins. We'll call it 'whore island' after the anchorman fashion.
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
I raged so hard that I was so hungover today I threw up out of a car window going 50mph cause my parents didn't pull over quick enough ...sorry to the people behind us
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
I would ride that face into the sunset
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
Randomize
