Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
I cannot remember December 31 for the past 3 years. it might as well not even exist on my calendar anymore
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
Sorry I don't make house calls. You wanna get blown you come over here. It's like rock paper scissors but vagina ALWAYS beats penis
It was like giving head to a cactus.
In this town being related to a brewing family or the owner of a sports team is like being royalty. It's like hooking up with the queen's nephew or something.
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
Whatever, you're gonna have to break it to mom that the reason I was so drunk at Christmas dinner is because she wouldn't stop asking me why I don't have a boyfriend
I mean seriously...It's like the universe is saying "your vagina is closed, move along"
Just reached for my phone in my non existant pocket while it was in my hand.
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
I'm too drunk to make ramen. What the fuck is this.
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
Randomize
