i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
Bring mistletoe to the strip club, and they feel obligated. they dont even charge you
When I got to his place, he served wine and cheese and made me sit on the balcony while he read his poetry to me. He cockblocked himself.
Fell into a man hole last night. I've been bleeding since 11pm. Got kicked out of the bar for being bloody.
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
Sometimes I send them texts like "I want to make you cry and lick up your tears" just to fuck with them. And THAT is how you get rid of a Stage 5 clinger.
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
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