the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
Caught in the act of lying. Lipstick literally all over his dick. He tried to make some story about darkwing duck or some shit but failed to realize he is a complete moron.
Im going to make a sandwich and see if my books came from amazon. I cant believe two years ago i was dating eight guys and teaching russian exchange students how to do shots.
It makes me really sad that some people start their saturdays running or biking instead of with 3 shots of tequila, a sausage biscuit, freaks & geeks and 2 orgasms.
Waiting to interview and found a beer in my purse from last night
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
I think it's time for tequila and I to go our separate ways
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
I don't think we should let her have pot anymore. She ate an entire package of bacon half-cooked and screamed that it was al-dente.
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
Of course he’s picking me up at the airport. I taught him the Lotus position last time we had sex.
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