it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
just ask for directions from a guy with a penis drawn on his window
I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
Siri just reminded me to pickup Plan B
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
There are 27 signatures on my ass. What the hell happened last night?
Every time someone made a cup you congratulated them by letting them sign your ass.
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
I'm one bad relationship away from owning seven cats.
Hey this is your roommate. You know the one that let you have sex with her while you called out your exs name and cried?
I have no recollection of that. You must have the wrong number. P.s. your thongs still on the ceiling fan.
Like how do you live your life and have never made a grilled cheese? The audacity of some people
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