I haven't worn deodorant in like three days and have been laying around in my underwear listening to music and drinking. I think i've made my own Bonnaroo in my apartment.
well most of my day revolves around power hour
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
Exactly how does jacking off in my purse count as a 'early christmas present'?
I took her to the bar and boom. All of my past slump busters were there. Shes cool enough to know what that means and said she was afraid they'd eat her so we left.
You sent me a cat video and you screaming drunkenly in my background
No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
I can't believe just smoked out of a pear
I can't believe you had a pear already made to smoke out of, that was impressive
Apparently i disappeared and no one found me until the morning , but i have fifty missed calls
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
Randomize
