Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
2 am we went back to his house. his mom handed us beers and cooked us pancakes. the next morning his dad had washed my car. i lied. living at home after college definitely does not suck.
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
Stop banging my friends. This is getting weird.
Stop being friends with hot 18 year old girls.
Unless you've also woken up wearing a poncho and a ring pop, I suggest you don't judge me. Okay, I even judged myself for that.
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
I plan on drinking enough to kill at least 2 frat boys and make an aa meeting weep for joy
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
I can hear my family downstairs singing Christmas carols as I masturbate
Random one night stand with a guy that had a USA tattoo on his ass. Can't possibly get more American than that
How do you say, "I love you, but i prefer sex with someone else." in a good way? Ponder that over a jack and coke and get back to me.
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
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