ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
So guy #2, the dancer, is programmed into my phone under the name H.uy. His number- 11 digits. I should have stopped drinking.
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
You need to get here now. A drunk girl just stumbled into our apartment. shes laying on the floor by our door.
hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
im hiding in a corner. drunk. with a plate of stolen jello shots. im pretty sure people are looking for me or the jello shots.
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
I love you like a cupcake loves an overweight child, very similar to the mannerisms of a whole cake but personal, and minus the commitment issues, plus just the right amount of icing; not to mention the convenience of mobility, and only a smidgen of the guilt😘
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
I definitely fucked a Trump supporter last night but I wouldn't let him fully admit it because then I would've had to leave and his cock and abs were too perfect
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
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