im 80% sure the guy across from me is taking pictures of my legs
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
My roommate has every episode of Full House. I'm going to fail my midterm tomorrow.
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
One of my preschool students told me today that it's not pollution that makes the water in lakes unclean. It's the hobos. I was absolutely speechless. And just so proud.
STOP CALLING ME LADY CHLAMYDIA
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
Last night, I accomplished the impossible. I pissed while riding my bicycle home without pissing all over myself. My Dutch friends gave me a round of applause and said I was now the king of holland.
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
If our text convos ever saw the light of day lives would be in tatters
40 year old guy made out with me last night while I had French fries in my mouth
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
Randomize
