took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
Apparently I was playing rock paper scissors against myself for 2 hours in the bathroom mirror.
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
Even though I wasn't drunk last night, I peed in the sink just so I could keep my record going
Was the mom I hooked up with decently attractive I feel like her two friends were hotter
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
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