apparently it's not kosher to shit in a litter box when there's a line for the bathroom
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
Couldn't find any balloons, so we're doing whippets out of condoms. Being a ho has its benefits.
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
Don't get into any trouble on your trip
The only foreseeable trouble would be pregnancy, but I gotta be sterile otherwise I'm beating some pretty fucking incredible odds
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
shes rolling around in the floor yelling my vagina hates me
Randomize
