If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
I'm pretty sure his head is too big to fit between my legs. Worthless.
your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
Tequila bombs in champagne seemed like a good idea at the time.
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
Was my shirt on fire at any point last night? Because I'm fairly sure my shirt was on fire.
Woke up with a text saying "when I get to see them titties again lil ma??" With 8 beads around my neck & an empty bottle of vodka in my arms.
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
Those people that talk about exercise endorphins have never experienced a 9x13 pan of mac n cheese endorphins
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
I am drunkenly riding a razor scooter up and down the hills of Cincinnati
What in the fuck are you doing with your life
He can sense you did cocaine and had park sex with a large ginger from Australia last night.
What happened to your back?
Rug burn. My ass is even worse.
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
