You were pretty committed to that cat costume. Between pukes, you would meow and assure people that you just had a hairball you couldn't get out...
Didn't get laid. But got a free pie from a waitress. A whole pie.
SURVIVED FINALS. CAN'T DIE FROM ALCOHOL POISONING. NOTHER SHOT. CAPS.
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
The empty keg landed on my head. It's a good thing we already got shitfaced or i'd be a vegetable and the humor would be completely lost.
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
I won't apologize to a one balled man
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
And I wasn't CONVICTED of a felony, I just committed one
If I die here, tell my vagina and my cats that I'm sorry.
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
Who the hell tries to steal eggnog.
Randomize