Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
Hookup with hot guy from gym, check. Wake up to find he's peed in my closet, double check.
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
I finally fell asleep and like an hour later he wakes me up and says "I've always to be woken up w a blowjob." Um, that's not how it works asshole.
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
Don't take a pillow from my bed. You don't know which ones of them my vagina has been on
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
I've broken 3 vibrators in the past month because I apparently am "too rough" with them. Is that even possible?!
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
Randomize
