Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
dude, she was giving me a lapdance and her thong had a skid mark. no I did not hit it.
New discovery: conditioner is better for jerking off than baby oil. Fuck yes.
She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
THE MIME IS MIMING TO BUST A MOVE KARAOKE. ALL MIME-RELATED EVENTS DESERVE CAPS LOCK
First booty call in Europe.. In Barcelona. With a German. In broad daylight.... Is that how they do it here?
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
Do not tell guys at bars about kittens you rescue. They will walk away.
WHO DOES THAT ON A TUESDAY? This is not a Drake joke, the girl doesn't turn up OR down. She doesn't do anything.
I just don't think it's that outlandish to ask that I don't get messages from my husband at 8:30pm on a Wednesday telling me he peed on our cat
just realized we fucked to the ultimate disney playlist last night. hakuna matata.
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