Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
I opened up her dishwasher and all I found was a spoon, a juice glass and all her sex toys.
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
Sitting at a bar next to a guy wearing sunglasses drinking a pitcher by himself and having an argument with himself over if journey is more ballin than kiss. Feel better about myself.
Now there are two cop cars. If I go to jail I just would like to thank you for making me wear boxers.
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
I lied. Can't workout today. Only exercises I'm currently capable of doing are breathing ones to keep last night's drinks ending up all over the classroom.
I mean honestly, I love naps like Anthony Weiner loves sending dick pics
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
I need you to get the emergency bail money out if the stuffed panda and go to the police station tot bail me out. I should be there in 20 minutes.
Randomize
