it turns out vodka filled condoms arent that funny
How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
my little brother just asked me why i have handcuffs. How do I tell him that his sister likes being taken advantage of in the bedroom?
i'm not sure when i reached "slam my own hand in the door" status but my half attached fingernail is not grateful.
Im officially canceling McCormick Monday. I got a raise.
Sooo grey goose Tuesday?????
We should probably start extreme couponing for the morning after pill.
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
Dude, if that was the MLB player I think it was leaving your bedroom this morning please tell me you got his autograph. It could pay the rent for like six months.
I bet your mom's never met a girl who's thrown up at the presidential inauguration before though.
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
God help them if any millennials are in the vicinity. Rent is too high and we no longer fear death
Randomize
