I just feng shui'd our living room furniture. You may be mad in the morning
I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
My parents showed me my IQ test from fourth grade, I'm shitting on my potential.
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
the only way I will be happy is if my gallon spiderman bucket is full of either popcorn, nutella and peanut butter, or fried rice. CHOOSE WISELY.
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
My parents got me a bottle of vodka and a puke bucket for christmas. I've already used both.
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
All I can remember from last night was eating nutella and touching myself to Weird Science.
Randomize
