You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
Somewhere out there, someone is getting laid. And then theres me, watching Star Trek porn while my roommate plays World of Warcraft next door
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
Yeah well my vagina has expectations too but they don't get met all the time.
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
Do what? I was just saying that at some point there's a chance I'll have a boner. Think of it like a guessing game. "Does he have one now?"
i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
I can't ever date him again. Whenever I see his face I just remember helplessly pissing myself in my car.
From one hot mess to another... Get it together.
I have the starring role in a literal shit show.
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
Friday is the holy day of drinking. Thou shalt observe the Sabbath. It's in the bible. Look it up bitch.
Randomize
