She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
I'm eating all of the evidence.
bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
Memorial weekend is going to be amazeballs. Jungle juice, drunk guys, and my vagina being stimulated by the vibrations of a 4 wheeler. I mean there is no way that can go wrong.
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
Last night I had sex with one of the groomsmen I was in the wedding with. In a stairwell. 13 years my senior. Thinking I should retire from the bridesmaid gig.
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
My mom asked me if I ever go on dates. I had to suppress the urge to ask if having casual sex with a freshmen counts as dating
I just pawned the ring from my ex boyfriend to replace the ring I lost from my current boyfriend. #thanks
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
I'm sobbing to NWA
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
Randomize