The ticket read "Found nude in a tree"
New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
as we were stuffing their 24 of beer into our bags you kept saying you wanted cheese strings. closest things we found were kraft singles. as the guys came up the stairs you kept screaming 'GET THE CHEESE! GET THE CHEESE!'
Just put a sign on a baby carriage that says "all daddy wanted was a blowjob" might get fired.
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
Walked into the bathroom and saw a Minion eating out Harley Quinn so this Halloween will be hard to top.
She's not answering my calls
Well it sounds like you really fucked up
WHO HOLDS A GRUDGE OVER MEMES
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
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